THE ONLY SINGLE FRIEND

As of now, I am the only

single friend out of my immediate friendship group.

Wahey. It happened. The day finally came.

So if you're a single guy, and you see me and my friends walking down the street together, I'm afraid your only option

is me, the girl who probably just walked into a lamp post

or trod in a nice big pile of dog crap.

LUCKY YOU.

For some reason this occasion feels quite momentous

yet I don't think it's properly sunk in yet what this

actually means. 

I knew it was going to happen; it was, as Tinie Tempah

would say, 'written in the stars', inevitable, and I don't mind

because out of all my friends, I'm probably

the one who is least fussed about being single and

definitely the most boy impaired.

It's only been this last year or so that I've got

comfortable just talking to boys and that I've actually begun

doing something along the lines of flirting.

I know this to be true because a guy I sit next to 

in class wanted to ask me something, but I was 

talking with this other guy who I get on really well

with, and he was like "will you two stop flirting"

and I went bright red. So there.

I can flirt and look like a human tomato

AT THE SAME TIME. 

Beat that.

Now as you may recall me previously saying, I have been

single all my life so I am completely clueless as to what it's

like to be in a relationship or be kissed or whatever.

One friend is so used to me being single that

when she listed all her single friends that she wanted to hook up

with her new boyfriend's fit friends, she completely forgot

about me.

Ay caramba.

I can't say I mind though, because to me,

going out on a date with someone I haven't met before

scares the heeby jeebies out of me, and 

knowing me, I'd probably do my Marge Simpson impression

or something weird (cool) like that in an attempt to 

seem impressive and attractive and alluring.

So where does all this leave me?

Well it leaves me single, yes, but

that doesn't mean I'm not happy, or that I feel like

I need to find some poor guy quick and force him to be

my one and only so that I'm not the odd one out.

If you embrace being single, you can have a

of a time.

Because the way I see it is this: I'm happy,

I am free, I live for me,  I love my life, I do whatever 

I want, when I want, I love myself for who I am,

 I'm confident in myself, I'm independent, strong,

I can stand up for myself, I've got my friends and family

and lastly, I can flirt( and imitate tomatoes)with 

whoever I want.

SO

AND YOU KNOW WHAT?

I RUDDY LOVE IT.