LIFE CHANGES// NOTE TO SELF//

Sometimes I like to read through my old journals

and notepads and diaries and remember all the things that

have happened to me. My life back then always seems so

different to life I have now and I find it strange

yet so interesting looking back on things in retrospective

when all is said and done and time has moved on.

I come across people who I had forgotten had such

an important influence over my life, people who I used

to care about so much but scarcely think of anymore, the same 

people I have in my life now or with whom my relationship

has changed either for the worse of for the better.

I come across hopes, aspirations, beliefs, fears,

problems, worries, struggles, changes, some of which I still

have, some that have changed completely and some which

no longer phase me like they used to or that I can laugh at now.

It's strange because you feel like the same person

you were back then and yet you don't.

When I read my old ramblings now I feel like a protective

and wise big sister, because although I read things

and I'm thinking 'no, don't do that, they'll only

hurt you' or 'oh no WHY WHY WHY WHY?!' at the same

time I'm thinking don't worry, you don't need to,

things will get better, trust me.

------------------------------------------------

That boy who drove you crazy won't bother you anymore,

that boy you never thought you'd get over well it turns

out you do. You and your friends will work out whatever

problems you had and you'll meet some amazing new friends

not far from now who you get on with so well.

You'll figure out what to do with your life and you'll 

work out what you want to do and how to do it.

You'll get those grades, you'll mend your heart,

you'll end up stronger, wiser, one day you'll talk to

boys without your face looking like a giant pimple.

Things might fall apart but better things will fall together.

There's still some obstacles to come but you'll get

through them and there's some amazing things that will 

happen that you are yet to experience.

It's true when they say everything happens for a reason,

you'll see that as you get older.

You aren't alone, you're not fat, ugly, unlovable,

you aren't worthless, you will pick yourself up,

dust yourself off and you will be okay.

The world won't end, the sun will shine again,

change will come and you will like it. You'll face 

your fears, find happiness in things you never expected to 

and do things you never expected to, and you won't worry 

about the trivial things so much. 

Life can be hard yet you'll realise it's 

value , you'll figure out what really matters and what doesn't

and you'll appreciate life in all it's perfections

and imperfections.

------------------------------------------------------